Holiday traditions

The holiday season is upon us. Literally. Thanksgiving is only weeks away, and Christmas is right around the corner.

For John and I, this time of the year is always hectic. I know it's hectic for everyone, but I feel it's doubly, or even triple-y, hectic for us. Not only do we have Thanksgiving and Christmas, but November 11 is our "dating anniversary", December 11 is my birthday and December 8 is my nephew's birthday. Plus, John's sister and brother-in-law also have birthdays in December.

Regardless of the craziness the holidays bring, I cannot wait for this time of year. It always seems to arrive quicker and pass faster with each year, but I still count down the days like a small child.

This year, especially, is going to be a special holiday season. For John and I, it's our last "single" Christmas. This time next year, we'll be preparing for our own holiday season in our own home. When I think about how we'll decorate our future home, what kind of traditions we'll do, I get really excited. There is so much to look forward to.

John and I will have been together four years next week. This Christmas will mark our fifth together. So far, we have mostly participated in my family's traditions. When we first met, John was amazed at the "togetherness" of my family. We have a lot of traditions, and we take them seriously. John's childhood, while still very good, was very different. When I asked him "How would you describe your family's holiday traditions?" his response was, "MY family's traditions? Nonexistent." I think you get the picture.

We generally eat Thanksgiving dinner at my parent's house, where there is, naturally, turkey, stuffing, potatoes, green bean casserole, and of course my mom's French Apple Pie.

In the days before Christmas, my mom and I make our traditional Christmas dinner: Tortellini. We make the pasta and filling (pork) from scratch, and we spend a day listening to Christmas music and drinking pink wine while we assemble quart after quart of tortellini. We also, of course, decorate the tree and the house to the nines.

We (usually) spend Christmas Eve with my family. For as long as I can remember, my family has gone to church and then either hosted or gone to Christmas Eve dinner with the same family we have been friends with forever. My dad (still) reads Twas the Night Before Christmas. Cookies are put out for Santa (what, he still doesn't come to your house?), stockings are filled, and we all go off to bed buzzed on our cocktails of choice and full from a great meal.

Christmas morning is spent leisurely opening presents. We have always opened presents together, taking turns, so everyone can see what everyone else got. We have an order, usually youngest to oldest. We have breakfast of scrambled eggs, bacon, raisin and oatmeal toast, juice and coffee. The rest of the day is spent rocking out to Christmas music, playing with new toys, taking a walk around the neighborhood, and just being together. For dinner, the tortellini is cooked in chicken broth and served like a soup, best eaten with a little Parmesan cheese, homemade bread and a good wine.

These are just a few of my favorite holiday traditions John and I have been participating in that I hope to carry over into our family. I love these traditions, and I hope (I think) John does too. With that said, I definitely want to create some traditions unique to us and our family.

What are some of your favorite holiday traditions? How did you blend your family's and his family's traditions? Did you create any of your own, and if so, what are they?

(All this talking about the holidays has me super ready for them. Although, Christmas cookies and fudge and all the other goodies aren't going to help me look good in my wedding dress. Maybe I should ask Santa for willpower this year.)

A more in depth explantation

There seems to be some confusion among friends and family (IRL and otherwise) over why I'm doing this.

This isn't something I'm doing because John told me I should, or even insinuated I should. Yes, he influenced some items on the list, but becoming a "better person" wasn't his idea, nor has he ever suggested I need to improve myself. He never said, "You know, Katy, I love you and all, but there are some things I think you can do so you'll be a better wife."

This is about personal growth and accomplishing certain things before getting married. It's about addressing things about myself I would like to change.

Let's face it, no one's perfect, and I fall far from the mark. I'm not trying to make myself into something I'm not for someone else. It's about learning. It's totally possible I could do something on the list and say, "Whoa! Never Again! That sucked." But it's also possible I could do something that completely changes my outlook on things for the better, or even tweaks me into a better person as well.

The truth of the matter is I don't know how to be someone's wife. I don't think anyone really knows how to be a good spouse until they're married, and I'm not claiming that riding a horse or conquering my fear of clowns will make me a good wife, but I do think I will learn skills necessary, that I currently lack, to be a good wife. Like courage, patience, tenacity and empathy.

So what I'm saying is, read a little more between the lines, and you might learn something. I know I am.

The quest

Getting married is a big deal.

I'm told that in order to have a successful marriage, one should be completely at peace with oneself prior to marriage. Totally happy with who you are as an individual. Or something to that effect.

I'm getting married next year. I am truly excited, and I honestly cannot wait to be the Future Mrs. So-and-So. While I am mostly happy with who I am (I haven't met anyone who is 100% happy. Everyone has some issue with themselves. I mean, nobody's perfect), I recognize, realistically, there are things I should probably do before going to the chapel.

Why am I doing this? I want to become the best possible version of myself before getting married, and by taking on this project, I can do that. Marriage is work, and I know it won't always be easy, but in all honestly, if I can make it through a horror film, conquer my fear of heights and clowns and go camping in one year, I can be one half of a happy marriage. In a way, it's a gift to my future husband, as I hope that becoming this better version of myself, I will become the best wife I can be.

From this point forward til my wedding day (tentatively scheduled for sometime in June 2011) I will take on my personal Everest and document every terrifying, exhilarating, amazing moment.

So, welcome :).